Your Health and Your Sex – Part 4

by Karl Leukert

We continue to be fascinated by the research that continues to be done that shows the link between your health and your sex. Truly they cannot be separated and in an Unashamed Marriage, regular sexual activity is part of the process of getting and remaining healthy. Here is PART FOUR of some of the reasons with links to the source material so you can read them for yourself. (Read part one HERE, part two HERE, and part three HERE.)

1) In an Unashamed Marriage, we believe that God intended husbands and wives to enjoy a wide variety of sexual enjoyment. However, we advise that it was God’s design that penile-vaginal intercourse be the main activity in marriage. His first command to Adam and Eve was to be fruitful and 7ad2135189b73ea0cce17c70a53d90d3multiply and there was only one way for that to happen. Once again, science confirms the benefits of this original plan. In the linked study, it shows the results of research that correlated all of the studies done on the benefits of various types of sexual activities. What was shown was that of all activity, regular intercourse is the most health producing sexual activity you can engage in. Condom use reduces this somewhat. “Other sexual activities have weaker, no, or (in the cases of masturbation and anal intercourse) inverse associations with health indices.” This is one more reason why pornography and masturbation should not be part of an Unashamed Marriage.

2) Numerous scientific studies have shown that women tend to live longer than men do. For wives, there are a number of thing they can do to help their husbands “catch up” to them in longevity. Of course exercise, eat a healthy diet, get plenty of rest, etc., we all know. But, according to a study in South Wales, the greater the frequency of sex, the longer men tend to live, taking into account all other factors. Wives, you may not want your husbands to read this. Look at this response to the abstract posting from a doctor.

Dear Sirs:

Over the years I have found an effective method of educating my patients is to make a copy of the first page of selected journal articles regarding topics which I feel are important to their health.

This has proven to be a useful way to motivate patients to make changes in their lifestyle, or to accept new therapies. There is something about seeing a recommendation in writing with the title of the journal at the top of the page that seems to motivate patients better than just the doctor’s word.

I recently made a copy of Dr. George Smith’s article on “sex and death”, and presented a copy to several of my married female patients for their opinion as to it’s usefulness.

I was caught completely off guard by their response. I was informed in no uncertain terms that if their husbands were ever made aware of this article or given a copy, I would have a very unhappy patient on my hands.

I have since taken a random survey of several more married female patients and hospital employees, and have found almost unanimous agreement with the sentiments of my initial group of patients. Several individuals felt this information might even lead to a deterioration in their marital relationship.

Hence, although this article presents some very interesting statistical data, it may not have a lot of practical significance in the real world, at least in one area of rural USA.

Sincerely,

Gary W. Berger, M.D.

3) Every year in the United States, billions of dollars is spent trying to discover the fountain of youth. Many women think they have discovered it in a syringe filled with Botox. According to recent research in Scotland, instead of a fountain, it may actually be springs of youth, as in bed springs. Over 10 years, scientists have had 3,500 individuals from Europe and America ranging in age from 20 to 104 come into interview rooms where they asked them a series of questions about their lifestyles. While this was taking place they were being watched through a 2-way mirror by volunteer judges who were guessing their ages. When all the data was tabulated, it was discovered that the people watching guessed the ages on average 7 to 12 years younger than the participants actual ages. Of all the things that was a determining factor in the appearance of youth, regular sexual activity was the second most important behind overall health, with a 3 times a week being the optimum frequency. The research also indicated that casual sex doesn’t count in providing this benefit. It only occurs in a long-term committed relationship – LIKE MARRIAGE!

Your Health and Your Sex – Part 3

by Karl Leukert

How important is it to remain sexually active as we age? We have two sections on this in this. Read on to also find out how sex can actually make you smarter. (Read part one HERE and part two HERE.)

1) One of the unfortunate parts of aging is that certain activities – including sex – tend to go through change. Frequency, intensity and duration of all physical exertion will diminish.But, according to a Dutch research study reported on in an article by the Wall Street Journal, if couples will continue to be sexually active or at least keep a positive attitude about their desire for and pleasure received from OlderCouple-©iStockphoto.comSTEEXtheir sexual activity, it will have a significant impact on their cognitive function later in life. According to the abstract of the study itself, “general cognitive functioning (Mini–Mental State Examination), memory performance (Auditory Verbal Learning Test), processing speed (Coding Task), and fluid intelligence (Raven’s Coloured Progressive Matrices),” all showed significant positive correlation, particularly for women. As you age, do all you can to remain sexually active and keep enjoying what God created to the full!

2) We don’t know what it is about the Dutch and sex research, but another study done there shows yet another amazing benefit that the Creator designed from husbands and wives enjoying knowing each other – physically, emotionally, and spiritually. According to the results of this study, when individuals are sexually aroused, even just thinking about sex, they score higher on tests requiring critical thinking skills. In other words, sex itself can make you smarter!

3) One more effect of aging, this one for men, is prostate issues. According to research, God made provision for this in that wives can help their husbands avoid this by making sure they have frequent sex. In fact, according to the numbers, the minimum goal should be 4 times a week. Now that is something to put on your calendar and plan for!

 

Your Health and Your Sex – Part 2

by Karl Leukert

More fascinating links between health and sex. Does an apple a day have an impact on sexual pleasure? How can sex impact migraine headaches? Read on for answers to these questions and more. (Read part one HERE.)

1) One of the complaints that many women typically have about their husbands is that they just won’t talk to them about deep emotional things. This, can cause serious strains when it comes to time in the bedroom because, especially for the wife, sex is a very emotional experience. But according to research, it is for men too! This is because during orgasm there is a large release of oxytocin – the bonding chemical. Because of this men are more open to talk about deeply intimate issues AFTER SEX than at other times. So wives, if you want deeper conversation with your feet-224680husband, take him deep in the sheets first.

2) We’ve all heard the old adage “an apple a day keeps the doctor away”. While there is ample scientific proof that eating more fresh fruits, vegetables, nuts, and seeds will make us healthier, there is actually a study that was conducted in Italy that showed that, talking all other factors into consideration, women who eat an apple a day report an overall better sexual experience. Maybe that’s a better slogan for the apple growers!

3) For those individuals (mostly females, but some males as well) who suffer from migraine headaches, a cure is something they would give just about everything they own on earth to have. Until science discovers this, they look to various coping mechanisms to live with the condition. In our marriage, Karl is the one who has the “joy” of these debilitating episodes. For those who suffer with this condition, they learn their triggers, seek out the right medications or more natural therapies. According to research conducted in Germany, about 1/3 of sufferers should add sex with their spouses to their treatment options. (Actually the spouse part was not part of the research, but this is Unashamed Marriage.) If you have migraines and have not tried sex for relief, what have you got to lose? Oh, Karl was really bummed that he is not part of the third that gets relief, but we enjoyed trying – multiple times.

Your Health and Your Sex – part 1

by Karl Leukert

We continue to be fascinated by the research that continues to be done that shows the link between your health and your sex. Truly they cannot be separated and in an Unashamed Marriage, regular sexual activity is part of the process of getting and remaining healthy. Here is PART ONE of some of the reasons with links to the source material so you can read them for yourself. As Christians, we start with a belief that God designed us as sexual creatures and that all of the research is just us discovering more of the the incredible gift of marital sex that He made.

1) God created men and women and He designed our sexual responses and benefits. He did this because He is a God of love and wants us to have an abundant life. The Bible describes Adam and Eve as being naked and unashamed and that as husbands leave their parents

and join with their wives they become one flesh—definitely sexual imagery. He inspired wise Solomon to write the sexually-charged Song of Solomon. And He showed His care for the sexual pleasure of women when He gave a command in the Old Testament 507959_70612257that upon marriage men should stay home for one year to learn how to please their wives. This injunction was not given to women for their husbands. Science backs up what God began!

2) Life, especially married life that includes some children, can be – scratch that – IS stressful. There is ample research to show the destructive nature of stress on our bodies and there is just as much ample advice on how to handle that stress in positive ways. The next time you and your spouse are stressed, head to the bed for some relief under the sheets. This article from Biological Psychology indicates that the greatest stress reducing sexual activity is penile-vaginal intercourse. If you are not sure of the impact this method of stress-relief might have in your own marriage, check out this true-life story.

3) In a 2012 article on Forbes, it states that there is roughly $227 billion a year in lost productivity in the US a year due to illness or workers who go to work not feeling well and unable to perform at peak performance. You and your spouse can help each other stay well by staying active sexually. Here is an article that outlines some of the ways that sex can boost your immune system.

Ten Tips for Great Communication

Take your hands, turn them over and look at the ends of your fingers. Use those tips to communicate your love to your spouse.

Just Watch

This weekend, spend some time to just watch your spouse. Notice a new nuance of their behavior and learn to love them more for it. When they realize what you are doing, just smile slyly and say, “Oh, just enjoying my favorite view.” Let us know how they react.

Will It Blend?

One of the videos we like watching online is the series about the Blendtec blender. Each video asks, “Will it blend?” It got us thinking. The successful marriage is not in losing yourself in each other. It is in the blending of your lives with each other where each remains unique and yet where the two are more than each other alone.

Keep Your Bed Small

by Karl Leukert

Our first bed when we got married was a hand-me-down that used to be in a guest room at Karl’s grandmother’s house. It was a full-size frame and mattress that was just perfect for our two-bedroom apartment in the married student housing at the university we were attending. When the mattresses were first purchased, they were at the higher end of price and value and were still fairly comfortable. (As newlyweds, they served our active needs quite well. BIG SMILE!)

As the years went by and our bedroom activity continued (not too mention the addition of some weight), they began to deteriorate. When we got ready to purchase new ones, we decided it was time to upgrade both in quality and size. Karl had the idea that if we could we should go with king size. Bigger is always better, right? Due to constraints of the budget and the size of the room where we lived at that time, we had to settle for just a queen size.

While this did help us not be as crowded while sleeping, we still were near enough that during the night we were able to touch each other and to cuddle up to each other. Of course, an added benefit was that as we felt each other, it did lead to some great middle-of-the-night sexual activity. But, didn’t we need a bigger size?sexualcontact.feet_

The first time we went away for the weekend to a hotel with a king-size bed, we discovered our answer. While there was much more romping room, we found that if we felt the need to feel each other’s skin during the night, we nearly had to go on an expedition to a foreign country to find each other and it almost seemed like we were not even in the same bed. We have to say that aside from the additional room for sexual activity, we really did not like it. Now, when given the option, we will choose a room with two queen-size beds, rather than one king.

Without knowing it, we have realized what other couples have:  sleeping close together and having regular touch while sleeping is actually part of marital satisfaction. According to a recent British poll of 1,000 couples (links to articles below), those couples who claimed to sleep less than one inch apart from each other reported an 86% satisfaction with their relationship versus only 66% satisfaction when the reported sleeping distance was 30 inches or more.

Our recommendation for your Unashamed Marriage:  keep your bed small. Choose a size that keeps you touching as much as possible!

 

MAKE IT REAL

1)      See how many sexual positions you can utilize in the space of a twin-size mattress.

2)      Cuddle more often away from the bed. It releases health producing oxytocin.

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http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/sex/10768902/Happiest-couples-sleep-an-inch-apart.html

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/science/what-does-the-way-you-sleep-say-about-your-relationship-9264867.html